The Dark Side

And she looked up at the sky

Laughing, her heart soaring

Like the birds flying so high.

With so much sparkle, they shined so bright,

Carrying more laughter and spirit than her lips,

Were her eyes.

White frock she wore,

Painted with pink flowers and green leaves,

She knew she could achieve anything in the world,

As long as she believed.

Her arms spread so long,

Like wings with which she could spin around,

Metres above the ground,

And glide along a wave,

Throughout life without any hardship,

Or crossing any path that was tough,

Prancing around from crest to crest,

From trough to trough.

With hair so long, that touched the ground,

She heard no noise, music was the only sound,

She felt like she wanted to celebrate everyday,

She was not afraid of life, come what may.

But when she put her feet on the ground,

Reality was something to which she had to abide,

And that’s when she got introduced to the dark side,

And that’s when something in her died.

She was no longer soaring in the sky,

She was floating without gravity in outer space,

There were no birds, only demons and ghosts,

Roaring in her face.

She had lost her spirit and sparkle,

Her face was pale,

Her lips were white,

And there was a constant innocent sadness,

Carried within the depth of her eyes.

Colours seemed to fade,

And so did her beliefs.

Gray was her shirt,

Gray was her dreams,

With no strength up her sleeve.

Life was still a wave,

But hardships began to be seen,

Everyday, every person seemed so mean.

It was hard to move from trough to trough,

It was hard to move from crest to crest,

Without feeling a weight in her chest.

And then she woke up from her sleep,

And realized that it was all a horrible nightmare.

She decided that she wouldn’t get conquered by the dark side,

Sometimes there may be less rainbows than rain,

Sometimes there may be less pleasure than pain,

But the choice of response to the demons within her,

Wasn’t just her experience, but her responsibility,

And she was responsible towards herself,

For creating a life which would make her happy again,

Even when the rest of the world seems insane,

So, with a smile on her face and a hope of a better dream this time,

She went back to sleep beside her king,

And covered her teary eyes with her beautiful hand,

Which, for the first time, didn’t have her favourite ring.

Copyright © Upasana Goyal 2016

Different Kind of Beauty

No, nothing can stop me now,

Yes, I was weak.

But now I am strong.

Now I will let my chains loose,

Because, now I realize,

Strength is not something that comes to me,

Strength is something I choose.

When I was younger,

I was caught up in myself,

Thirsty for life,

Crying for help.

I remember walking into a room,

A room full of friends laughing at me,

Thinking to myself, that I’m not enough,

And that I’m not how I’m supposed to be,

I felt so consumed,

Not knowing that I was a different kind of beauty.

Everyone is beautiful in a different and unusual way,

But it takes great experiences and a big heart,

To look without judgemental eyes,

To promote more love than hatred in others’ minds,

And to understand that it’s better to laugh along,

The laughers who laugh at you as they laugh—

Only because they are truly empty inside.

Now that I’ve grown older, wiser and stronger,

I choose to set myself free,

And to embrace who I am,

Because I’m a different kind of beauty,

And that’s who I’m proud to be.

Copyright © Upasana Goyal 2016

Free flow of energy

I wish there was an easy way

To feel what we want to feel

To do what we want to do

I wish there was an easy way

An easy life for me

An easy life for you.

I wish there was more sunlight

I wish there were more cars

Then people would take more road trips

The world would be dominated by

The power of love

Not the love of power.

I wish there was more kindness

I wish there was more light

People could talk more humbly

People could talk more lovingly

Then no one would treat another like a mess

And every person would feel more beautiful

More comfortable with themselves

Then people would live their life

By creating more beauty around them

Come what might.

I wish there were more games

More carom boards, more chess and checkers

And hearts wouldn’t bleed of sorrow

Then life wouldn’t be so lame

I wish there was a free flow of energy

More hearts who know how to receive love

More hearts who don’t have any trouble in radiating positivity

I wish there was more laughter

People could then embrace themselves for who they are

No one wouldn’t need any material object to be happy

Each one would live their life feeling like a Hollywood star.

I wish there was more mercy, more love and more charity

And people wouldn’t concentrate their possessions to themselves

I wish there were more people who didn’t beg

More people who were willing to help.

I wish it was easy

The free flow of energy

To find ways to fill this entire world with kindness

To fill this entire world with positivity

I wish people would realize

That they are the only reason

Why they live their life on Earth

With both joy and suffering

Only if everyone believed in themselves

And allowed themselves

And everyone around them

A free flow of emotional energy

This planet will be called Heaven instead of Earth

And everyone will prosper

And everything would work out beautifully.

Copyright © Upasana Goyal 2016

When nothing works out, I believe.

When nothing works out,
I believe.
I believe in the unseen,
I believe in the unsaid,
I believe in the unwritten,
I believe in the unread.

When nothing works out,
I believe.
I believe in the darkness,
For darkness is the purest, simplest reminder,
Of the necessity of light.

When nothing works out,
I believe.
I believe in the beauty of the night,
For the night tells us,
That we should give happiness a chance,
When we feel completely low.
Just like when it’s full of complete darkness,
It gives a chance for the stars to glow.
Tiny Stars twinkle in the bed of much darkness,
But that’s what makes the sky look beautiful-
In the end.
So when I’m feeling dark inside,
At least, to myself, I won’t hide or pretend.

When nothing works out,
I believe.
I believe in the opportunities,
That slip away from my hands.
For I may have had great expectations,
But that means,
God had greater plans.

When nothing works out,
I believe.
I believe in the uncertainty,
For only uncertainty has enough power,
To make us explore,
The infinite possibilities lying unfound,
In the deep corners of our soul.
And knowing those possibilities will help me,
To choose my path,
The path that I want,
The path where I’m supposed to go.

When nothing works out,
I believe.
I believe in the consistent failures,
Failures of minds, hearts, bodies and souls.
For if everything and everyone succeeded at once,
We’d all take success for granted,
And there’d be no progress in this world at all.

When nothing works out,
I believe.
I believe in every little flaw,
That lies within me.
For if I was perfect,
I’d never be able to make mistakes,
So I’d never be able to learn and grow.
And if everyone’s insides weren’t somehow a mess,
People would only be attracted to bodies,
There’d be no such thing as inner beauty,
Or the attraction of souls.

When nothing works out,
I believe.
I believe in the hopelessness,
I believe in the inability to try,
I believe in the everyday troubles,
I believe in the power of the tears I cry.
For no one can get out of a maze, unless they’re stuck in it.
And when I get out, I will be utterly polished.
And through this challenge, at least I can acknowledge,
That I’m still alive.

When nothing works out,
I believe.
I believe that I can’t give up,
Because somehow I’m still meant to try,
I believe that I can’t try,
Because somewhere I’m meant to give up.
I believe that I can’t let go,
Because there’s something I’m supposed to hold on to,
I believe that I can’t hold on,
Because there’s something I’m supposed to let go.

When nothing works out,
I believe.
I believe in the unsolved puzzles,
I believe in the unanswered questions,
I believe in the locked doors,
I believe in the unfathomable emotions,
I believe in the restlessness of the mind,
I believe in the dissatisfaction of the heart.
For without these we’d never know,
How much certain things mean to us,
Certain things, precious things,
Like solutions, answers, keys to the locks,
Understanding, satisfaction and stability.

When nothing works out,
I believe.
I believe in the negativity that comes to me,
Through within or without,
For it is not a problem, but only a gift,
It’s the gift of a trigger,
As it triggers me to start my hunt for positivity.

When nothing works out,
I believe.
I believe in the mysterious force,
Some may call it God, luck, destiny,
Conscience or the sub-conscious mind.
I believe in the ways of this mysterious force,
That are righteous, positive and divine.
And when nothing works out,
I believe.
I believe that this mysterious force will show me,
Show me the way to shine.

Copyright © Upasana Goyal 2016

The Ghosts Within Me

I have the faith,
I keep up the faith,
The ghosts within me,
Will take me home,
My heart still has to beat,
And it beats all alone.
The ghosts within me,
Are are a curse and a boon,
They continue to haunt me,
Night, morn and noon.
I wish to reach there,
Home it is.
And I love those ghosts,
I'd blow them a kiss.
I'm gonna reach there,
That I know, because
Bliss comes only from a mental belief,
And beliefs are the mental seeds you sow.
The process might as well kill,
But I am gonna love it still,
For it takes me where I wanna go,
These ghosts might turn into elixirs,
Or into a poison that's slow.
It could make all my dreams come true,
Break me, or make me feel alive once again.
These ghosts are madly in love with me,
Because I am madly in love with this pain.
So they're gonna want me,
Because where there are glorious rainbows,
There has to be an unpleasant rain.
And I'm gonna want them,
Just for the sake to get back home.
So now, I'd take this haunted ride,
And poof, the ghosts would disappear from my side-
Once I reach there, dead or alive.

Copyright © Upasana Goyal 2016

The psychology behind the repetition of anything makes us reach the ‘hook’ point

Repetition is an important aspect of our daily lives. All of us repeat certain things on a daily basis. But do you ever wonder what repetition can do to our brain? Repetition is a superpower possessed by us humans, and upon a conscious realization of this power, we can perform wonders. As a matter of fact, subconsciously all of us are witty and clever enough, and we sometimes, use this power unknowingly. Here are some interesting examples for you to check out:

The Nagging Child, The Nagging Spouse (the legendary icon)

Most children are evil enough (no offence) to know that if they repeat a request often enough to their parents, their parents will eventually give in. Some of us never outgrow this habit of repetitive persuasion, only to become the nagging spouse, the extra-cheesy and sweet-slash-extra-pathetic and annoying, yet legendary icon.

I know how to train my dog!

Ivan Pavlov, a Russian physiologist, discovered a way with his dogs, a way to condition them by the repetition of a cue or a trigger and connecting it with a selected action. This can be a colour, a shape, a tune or a host of other things.

Advertisers work on the same principle.  Yep, that’s right. Humans are no better than dogs.

The brutal purpose behind the consistent repetition of adverts-in almost every single place inside the print and the electronic media world-is to make us psychologically function like dogs. Sounds harsh, but it’s true.

What I mean to say is what the advertisers want is that when we go to the market, the feeling or the thoughts that were evoked upon repeatedly seeing a particular advert, gets revoked upon seeing the product. This happens because the advert is repeated to our brain multiple times, and we begin to associate the feelings that aroused from a particular emotion, theme, colour, shape, tune or story that was present in the ad, with the product.

Some music; and some dance baby!

The technique of using repetition and pattern making to our advantage is often used by music-makers and dancers. Beats, stanzas, steps-all of it-is repeated in almost all forms of dance and music. And the audience always loves it, because our brain is a crazy lover of patterns and of the concept of being in a routine. Also, the repetition in music and dance has a hypnotic effect on us, that is the only reason why we feel ‘lost’ and go in a trance-like state when we’re in the middle of listening to our favourite tune or slow dancing with our beloved partner.

Back to School: Time to study the same thing...again.

Schools and educational institutions use the principle of repetition by teaching or testing the same topic more than once. Students themselves are willing to study a topic more than once, because they feel that it would help in better retention and would last longer in their memory.

‘Practice makes perfect’

The age-old phrase ‘Practice makes perfect’ emphasis on nothing but the significance of repetitive practice. If we repeatedly practice a particular skill or activity, our brains get used to it. For example-walking in heels-an activity that needs to be practiced before we can get good at it. (At least I think it does.) So basically, when we repeatedly practice something, our brain gets used to it, and we sometimes get good at it, which leads to self-motivation and further persuasion to continue that practice. That is how we develop hobbies.

The basic principle behind repetition, how it works and why it is so effective is that repetition leads to familiarity, which makes that repetitive pattern more understandable or known to our brain, which leads to the embedment of the pattern inside us. Because of that, we tend to either like or appreciate that pattern; or we are simply unconsciously convinced or persuaded to follow the pattern in the future. Repetition always leads to more liking than contempt. That is why the repetition of a particular pattern can make us feel ‘hooked’ to that pattern.

Those who are consciously aware of what repetition can do, can use it to their advantage. Pretty interesting, right?

 Copyright © Upasana Goyal 2016

Strive not to be independent, but to be interdependent

The Oxford Dictionary defines interdependence as the ‘dependence of two or more people or things on each other.’ But most of us today fail to realize the significance of this term or its necessity in our lives.

When a kid is born, she has no clue of the world around her. So she is raised in a way that is supposed to empower her in every way, in order to help her grow into a refined individual. She is spoon fed almost every single thing-food, information, knowledge, money and other material things that would help her grow. As soon as the child reaches the stage of adolescence, the sole motive of growing up into a rational and a strong human being translates into the motive of being independent as soon as possible. But the most dangerous part of that phase comes when, and if, the urge of being independent becomes an escape. When this happens, we tend to see independence as a stage where life is easier, and we begin to associate the feeling of happiness and fulfilment with it. But the truth is, our lives just cannot get any easier or happier by trying to derive happiness from external sources of any sort. Human beings are a type of species that can never be completely satisfied, and the desire of being in a hypothetical phase in the future with one hundred percent fulfilment can never be completely satisfied. We will always want more and more to feel fulfilled. Human urges, desires and temptations only increase if the previous ones are satisfied. This is a natural tendency of our species. When we begin to associate the idea of independence as a futuristic escape for happiness and fulfilment, we usually tend to get dissatisfied with our lives in the present. This leads to either a life of self-doubt, uncertainty, resentment or hatred towards oneself. Any negativity of the sort stops us from achieving our goals in the present, and leaves us with the option of creating our future in the future, which is impossible. This is quite ironical, because nurturing such negative emotions within ourselves makes us more and more dependent on the people around us. We begin to question ourselves, which usually leads to the inability to make our own decisions, and so we eventually lose control on our lives in both the short and the long term. We begin to get controlled by our insecurities, or simply by the fear of the future. Some people go to extremes to quench their desire of achieving this stage of independence and fulfilment. They go through a mid-life crisis, create a huge gap or delay in their relationships, or simply move out of their marriages and abandon their relationships. Or worse, they could even resort to crimes or commit suicide.

One must realize that in order to achieve the stage of overall development, all of us must abide by the principle of interdependence for living a happy life. Believing in inter-dependence means to be self-aware enough to understand that there is strength to stand on our own, but there is also a greater strength on relying and depending on others along with that. Developing strong relations with the people around us, and a healthy co-existence is important; it helps in the overall development of the individual as well as a community.

So today, I send this message to all the young and the ambitious people out there. Let go of the desire to settle. Let go of the desire to settle with your narrow idea of what you call a happy, fulfilled and an independent life. It will only lead you astray. Life could be much bigger and better than that. Work towards your goals, but only to depend on one another, and to empower and uplift each other. That’s the real quality of a winner. She never settles, or buys the idea of ultimate perfection or fulfilment. Moreover, she is quite aware of the fact that she is a winner, not only because she wants to be, but also because that’s what the people around her think she is.

“You will never be entirely comfortable. This is the truth behind the champion – he is always fighting something. To do otherwise is to settle.” – Julien Smith.

Copyright © Upasana Goyal 2016